Those of you who read this blog with any regularity probably know what a monumental event this was for me. Over the past 18 years or so, the Bridge has become the personification of a series of events that coalesced in my mind to create a psychological Black Hole. As a result, I haven't visited the lovely town of Coronado - my old Navy stomping grounds! - in over 15 years. For just as many years, I couldn't even LOOK at the Bridge, much less contemplate crossing it, without having something akin to a panic attack. The last time someone in my riding crew mentioned a trip to Coronado, the blood drained from my face and I almost passed out (which forced the issue to be dropped rather rapidly).
This post from many months ago tells about the events that lead to my psychological Black Hole (sorry, I don't know how to do the embedded link thing):
http://daughterofnight.blogspot.com/2007/05/haunting.html
Anyway, I DID it. I cried and almost puked, but I DID it.
And the moral of the story is: never underestimate the power of a good wingman. Courage only got me part of the way.
3 comments:
Wow! Now that's my definition of brave. Confronting fear when you have other choices.I know it will never be easy to drive over that bridge, no matter how many times you do it, but now you know the act of doing it isn't as bad as the thought of doing it. That's a big step in my opinion. I'm proud of you for having the courage to attempt it and grateful you had the support you needed to finish it.
Well done!!!!!
Thanks, David. It was truly a pinnacle day. Like you said, I'm not going to be making a habit of it, but I know I CAN do it. And that's a really good thing to know. :-)
I haven't been reading your blog regularly but your triumph oozes from your writing. It's clear that congratulations are in order.
I also really liked what you wrote on post secret.
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