Monday's Pointless Rant

* Just because YOU felt you were "taken off guard" does not mean that I "handled it badly." If you were doing what you were supposed to be doing instead of trying to go behind my back, you wouldn't have been "taken off guard." Remember that next time you argue with a direct order. And the next time I catch you trying to circumvent an order given for YOUR OWN SAFETY, you can think about it while you're on the beach for a couple of days.

* Your incompetency does not constitute an emergency for me. I'll un-fuck your situation when I have a moment to do so. If it even CAN be un-fucked. You are offered training for a reason and the rest of us can only assume that you're paying attention. If you didn't, well, shame on you and woe to whatever family is on the receiving end of your ignorance.

* Don't cut me off so severely that I have to actually "Tokyo Drift" (on a fucking motorcycle, no less) to get out of your way, and then pull up beside me to tell me I "look so hot on that bike" and expect any other reaction than the one you got, you brainless troll-faced menace.

* Please, please, PLEASE take a few moments to proofread before you bring me a report. Training issues are one thing, but misspelled words, missing words, poor grammar, and sentences with no discernable beginning or end are issues I can only assume a college graduate should be able to catch before submitting a report for review. If you just can't bring yourself to proofread, for God's sake don't look surprised and dismayed when I bring the fucking thing back to you for corrections.

* Move out the second you graduate if you want to, girlfriend, but remember that life is really fucking hard when you work part-time retail and don't have a driver's license or a pot to piss in. Yes, I know... you're "in love" and "nobody else understands" and you'll "find a way to make it work" because you're "supposed to be together." I'm sure I'm just overreacting again.

* Why on God's green Earth would I buy ANYTHING you're trying to sell me over the phone???? Do people ACTUALLY give you their credit card numbers and addresses in order to purchase an item sight unseen from a total stranger????? I can't figure out if the joke is on you or on me!!

* Hey, Disney Channel! Your programming is NOT APPROPRIATE for children! Fucking Sponge Bob is chock full of positive moral messages, but you can't seem to make a program that doesn't revolve around youngsters lyuing to their parents or trying to get away with something they shouldn't be doing or both at the same time!! Stop teaching our children to misbehave, and yes, it IS your responsibility!