The Law of Gross Tonnage

A 12-year-old autistic child was hit by a woman driving a mini-van last night, just around the corner from my home, as he fled the local Hollywood Video store with an armload of DVDs he had just stolen. He is critically injured and may not survive.

Apparently the young man was notorious for DVD-snatching: this store (where I also rent and buy movies) keeps previously viewed DVDs outside in boxes and sells them 4 for $20. Unless you happen to be 12, autisitc, and out after dark with no parental supervision. Then they're free.

Until the unthinkable happens, of course. Can anyone count the cost of those DVDs now?

It's heartbreaking, as it would be to hear of any child critically injured in an accident. More so in this case because this is a child who obviously needed - and obviously lacked - responsible parenting. I do a lot of work with Autism NOW and AutismSpeaks, and have the honor of knowing families who have approached the awesome responsibility of parenting this unique population with creativity and passion; I know parents who have found ways to ensure that their children's needs are met that wouldn't even cross the minds of most people. Families with autistic children take parental responsibility to the pinnacle. Usually.

Because autistic children can not be unsupervised. Not at age 2, not at age 12, in some cases not in adulthood.

But what really sticks in my craw is the fact that this situation is indicative of a greater circumstance that breaks my heart every day: sometime during the last 30 years, parenting became an option, rather than an obligation. And it seems to me that fewer and fewer people are choosing to exercise that option. I could posit a plethora of theories to explain why this has happened, but why bother? The damage has already been done.

And I will never have to worry about job security because of it... though I'd be happy to work at Wal-Mart if it meant that people had started taking responsibility for their children and put me out of a job.

I'd be retired already if I had a nickel for every time I've heard a mother say, "He's bigger than me!! What am I supposed to do?" I'd have my own island if I had a nickel for every time I've heard a parent state that they don't discipline their children corporally because they fear their child will "report" them to Child Protective Services. I could build a private correctional facility with the money I'd have if I charged a nickel every time a parent told me that he or she (or both) can't supervise their children because they "have to work." I could pay an army of tutors with the nickels I'd have from each parent who has failed to send an older child to school in favor of having them stay home to babysit the younger children.

I could build a 100-bed residential rehabilitation center with the nickels I'd gather from parents who've provided drugs and alcohol to their children so they wouldn't have to use alone. I could easily pay for gravedigging for the parents who've rented their child's ass out to anyone interested for enough money for the next fix.

I could feed the fucking world with the nickels I'd have from every parent who told me that they don't understand how their child "could have done such a thing."

Here's a tip, Mom: he did it because he could. Because you allowed it. Yes, here's the complaint form. Have a nice day.

I could probably catch up on the funds I've lost from failing to charge those nickels we've discussed by selling guesses at when the family of the austistic boy will file a lawsuit against Hollywood Video, but I'm not enough of an ogre to do it. When it happens, I honestly don't know if I'll laugh or cry.